Life's Tests to Healing - from Stolen Beauty

Children who are abused have their trust continually tested. "My mother beats up on me, but I should trust that it's okay." "My uncle sexually abuses me, but I should trust he loves me." "My parents verbally abuse me, but I should trust that their words are true." These are all tests in trust.

It's interesting to learn the original meaning of the word test. It is derived from the Latin word, testum. In the Middle Ages, testum became the word for the evaluation of precious metals in a shallow, porous cup, the cupel. When impure silver or gold was heated in the cupel, impurities in the metal were absorbed in the porous material, leaving a button of relatively pure silver or gold. The metal had been tested. By the sixteenth century, test was also being used figuratively. To 'put something to the test,' or to 'bring something to the test' was to make trial of it, to determine its quality or genuineness, as a precious metal was tested in the cupel.

If we bring this concept of testing into our lives today, we can say we are all being tested daily. We are all trying to determine what our quality is, learning how to find our genuineness, because we don't know about the precious metal that resides inside ourselves. Our souls are our cupels helping us to melt away the impurities of our lives so we may see the golden beauty within us.

If I had known then what I know now, I wouldn't have beaten myself up. I would have remembered the vibrant green leaves that rustled in the wind that day. They change into crimson and gold and eventually fall to the ground where they will be mulched into the soil and fed to the tree of life. They rest in winter and by spring will provide nutrients for the new leaves.

The human life cycle is much the same. We have tests; we make choices. Sometimes our choices cause us great pain and we need to rest to regain our strength. But the real beauty of our tests is not whether we pass or fail. It's coming to the understanding that all tests appear in our lives to help us find the beauty that was always there, sometimes hidden, but always there waiting to be revealed in its purest form. It is understanding that we don't fail our tests; they are lessons that help us discover the truth of pure gold that lies within each of us after the impurities have been melted out.